Seeing God by Nikki Watkin

On Ascension day a couple of weeks ago, our 4 year old son Reuben was creating art – a fairly common event in our household. He proudly showed it to me and I asked him about it.

There were a whole lot of houses in a cross shape in the centre –“that is the city” he said. (I still need to ponder that image.) Above the city was a big yellow smiley face –“that is God,” he told me. On both sides of the city were some people –“Who are they?” I asked. “Those people are frightened” he told me. So of course I asked why they were frightened, and he explained “because they can’t see God”. For him, that was reason enough to be scared. And it got me thinking.

Thinking about the angels who challenged the disciples who had been left standing there on the Mount of Olives after Jesus had ascended to the right hand of God. Check out the first chapter in Acts. The angels ask “Why do you stand here looking into the sky?”

Maybe the disciples were still standing there so they would not be frightened. They could no longer see Jesus. Which begs the question, when do we see Jesus? When do we see God? And another thought: When do children see Jesus? Do they see Jesus in our welcome? In our loving? In our blessing?

What a gift we give to those around us – whatever their age - when they encounter Jesus in us. If Reuben has got it right and in seeing God, fear is taken away, then it’s definitely worth thinking about.



Rev Nikki Watkin is part of our Kids Friendly team in Auckland. She is also a minister with her husband Richard at Kohimarama Presbyterian.

Worship: A way of life by Lucy Davey

We are called to a life of worship.  We don’t need to worship God in a particular place or at a particular time. Worship is something that can happen every day in lots of ways, if we let it.

I was recently moved by a story of Gaby and Isaac, four year olds whose worship in a sick-room brought comfort and peace.

Ingrid de Villiers, a teacher at St Heliers Presbyterian’s preschool Small Miracles shared this story:

“Gaby and Isaac attended Small Miracles since they were very young. Music plays a big part in our preschool and much of our Christian teaching is shared through music. Once a year we have a special Small Miracles celebration church service and this is often the only time many families attend church. This has been the case with Gaby and Isaac’s family. However, recently their granddad passed away and their dad told us this beautiful story about when their granddad was ill.

The children were taken to Wellington to visit their granddad in hospital where he was drifting in and out of consciousness. They sat on either side of the bed each holding their granddad’s hands. Dad noticed them whispering to each other and then they started to sing some of the songs that they had learnt at Small Miracles. They sang “Jesus is the Light” and “Walk in the Light” (really loudly according to their father).

Later, when their granddad was having a lucid moment he told their dad how much their singing had meant to him and how special and uplifting it was. Apparently Granddad was a religious man and I think it meant so much to him.

Gaby and Isaac have both left us to go to school but we sense that the Christian values and experience they have received at Small Miracles will be with them forever. Their parents have acknowledged this too.”

As we start thinking of our whole lives as worship to God, it transforms the way we view life and the things we do.  Whatever our age, wherever we are, whatever we do, we can bring glory to God.

At four, Gaby and Isaac seemed to intuitively understand this. Let’s keep learning from the children in our midst.

He called a little child, whom he placed among them. And he said: "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.   Matthew 18:2-3

Lucy Davey

(Lucy was a valued member of our Kids Friendly team from 2011 to 2012 until she moved South!  But she is still a wonderful advocate and encourager to Kids Friendly and a real attribute to her church Upper Clutha Presbyterian in Wanaka.  Lucy is also an accomplished children's author http://www.lucydavey.com/).

The robe of fatigue by Silvia Purdie

I went to a seminar this week on Clergy Self-Care. The presenter had researched clergy around the country and asked about their attitudes and practices around ‘self-care’. Obviously he found a mix of those who appeared to make their own personal lives a priority and those who were chronically tired, overworked and friendless. He quoted a writer on the topic saying that “many clergy never take off the ‘robe of fatigue’ ”.

I have a relationship with fatigue. But I certainly don’t want to wear it all the time. I know others in ministry who do. Some seem to wear it as a ‘badge of honour’, a sign of dedication to Christ and His church – like a ‘dog collar’ for non-Anglicans!

It’s pretty obvious why we get tired: long work hours, complex expectations, interruptions, blurring of home/work and relationship roles. Too often we end up caring for everyone around us and struggle to take days off or time ‘in lieu’.

My friend Mary-Jane Konings and I touch base often. When she told me about taking a funeral on Monday (her day off), I texted her to ask if she was taking another day off during the week. Her reply: “Ha ha ha ha ha ha!”. She is a wonderful Kids Friendly minister, but the demands of ministry in a large complex district mean that the fun, creative, missional stuff she loves to do, gets squeezed into tired corners.

When I talk with those who minister to and with children they often express being “tired”. Working with children can be wonderfully energizing, but it’s also physically demanding, and at times stressful and emotionally draining.

How about you? What do you find 'takes it out of you' the most?

I get tired when I spend the day rushing, trying to pack too much in, driving a little too fast to get to a meeting or a home visit, or to pick the kids up.

But fatigue is different from that. Fatigue is an accumulation of tiredness so that it builds up, hardens in the mind and soul and body, weighs us down. A ‘robe of fatigue’. A heavy yoke.

I’ve noticed for myself that what adds to my fatigue is the jarring I get when I shift modes of working. I love the deep listening pastoral work, the privilege of praying with people, leading worship, creating sacred space and stillness. Then 'wham' the phone rings or I have somewhere else to be 5 minutes ago and there are reports to write and money issues to sort and and ... . The diversity of ministry can be both a blessing and a curse.

If we don't watch out we can end up feeling bruised, stretched and out of shape by the end of the week. And tired, really tired.

I guess that’s why Paul wrote about the armour of God. Who wants a grey robe of fatigue when you could wear a shining shield, helmet, belt … or if you don’t want to mentally look like a Roman soldier, what picture works for you? A soft knitted shawl? An oilskin jacket? An elfish cloak?

Hey, I hadn’t noticed that before – the point of the spiritual armour is that “after you have done everything, to stand” (Ephesians 6:13) That’s the worst thing about ministry, especially children's ministry, you never feel that you have done everything, there’s always so much more to do. Imagine that. Still standing, still strong, still energised, confident, protected, sharp!

I like working hard. I like resting too, walking by the river, curling up in bed early. I like the Psalms, and night prayer, relinquishing my work and worries into the everlasting arms, hiding under the soft wings, being touched again by peace at the end of the day. Praise God I can take off the robe of fatigue – who needs it??

Three keys to sustainable ministry:
As you get to the end of the term how tired are you? What might you do differently next term so that you sustain your energy and care for yourself better?

Key 1: Work from your strengths and joys. Do more of what you do best, and give away as much as you can of the stuff that you dislike and find stressful.

Key 2: REST. We aren't so good at the 4th Commandment: "6 days you shall work but the 7th you shall rest". Take time, make time, carve out time ... to relax, breathe, be lazy, potter, chat, snooze, read, walk, pray.

Key 3: Support. Ask for help. Meet for coffee. Talk about your struggles. Make sure other people are praying for you. Laugh about it together!


This blog was written by Rev Silvia Purdie, minister of Milsom Combined Church in the Wanganui Manawatu Presbytery. Silvia is an avid Kids Friendly supporter, encourager and practitioner.

EASTER according to a five-year-old

After attending our church’s ‘A Walk through Holy Week’ family event including 7 interactive stations of the cross, a children’s booklet with things for them to look for and do at each station and supper, Sinead, our then five year old drew her response. Her Dad (Jason Goroncy) asked her to tell him about her drawings.... 

‘Anyway’, she said, ‘it’s all about Jesus’.

‘But what about the empty tomb?’ asked her theologian father.

‘We don’t worship the tomb, daddy’, she said. ‘Jesus is the bit that matters’.

‘So why is there a cross?’

‘Because people always seem to forget about that bit, and because that’s how Jesus remembers himself to us’.

‘But what about the yellow bit?’

‘Ah. That bit is just to make it pretty, silly’.

Welcome to our table

I’ve been having a few conversations about children being invited to the communion table.  Most have been positive, in my view, as churches are taking seriously the call to “let the children come” and inviting children to participate in our holy sacrament. 

I heard of one church where the session decided not to proceed with their Kids Friendly self-review because they don’t believe children should be invited to receive communion.  Their minister contacted me to clarify if “children receiving communion” is a requirement for Kids Friendly churches.  

It’s NOT a requirement.  However when churches tell me children are not invited to participate in communion, I ask them to encourage their leaders to read others’ views on the topic (Kids Friendly has some very good articles on the subject if you’re interested), discuss what they read together and prayerfully consider their decision. 

Most Kids Friendly churches decide to invite children to the table and carefully plan how they will educate children about this sacrament and how their communion liturgy engages children.  One minister shared:  “Last Sunday I decided to ask children to help me prepare the table and assist elders in serving communion.  This was a first for our church and it was the most powerful communion service I’ve ever experienced.”

My research has revealed no theological reason for excluding children and the too often cited “they don’t understand” excuse is, I believe, unfounded.  My understanding is that communion is a meal of grace for which no one needs to qualify.  Fortunately in our denomination previously churches that included children in communion had to explain their reason for doing so, now it is the reverse. 

We Were All Children Once by Cate Burton

Cate is a ministry intern at 

St Peter’s Presbyterian in Tauranga (NZ). 

She is also an avid Kids Friendly 

practitioner and advocate.

We were children once, we all were
Eyes wide, wild with excitement
Grinning and giggling with infectious delight
Faces bright, alight with adventure
Feet quick for exploration
Open hearts to love, hearts open to be loved
We were all children, we still are

Author and play write J. M. Barrie, created the character Peter Pan; a boy who never grew up, a boy who’s friends were fairies and other lost boys who lived together like brothers, a boy who desperately needed his mother but was too afraid to admit it.

We’re not as defiant as Peter Pan, I don’t think. He didn’t want to grow up. We don’t mind it so much. But what would it mean for us to take a leaf out of Peter Pan’s book (or a feather out of his hat), and not be too quick to relinquish our youth or lose our identity as children – even when our childhood years have long since passed?

 It’s not about being childish, it’s about being childlike.

In Christian circles we’ve been guilty of advocating that our children should be seen and not heard. I think we’ve got this wrong. We’ve mistakenly seen our children as the church of tomorrow. We’ve said these things with our words and we’ve said them with our actions.

Our society at large is often guilty of seeing the elderly as no longer contributing and being “put out to pasture”. We haven’t always said it with our words but we’ve said it with our actions and we’ve said it in the things that we haven’t said. Sadly, this has happened in parts of the Church too. I think we’ve got this one wrong as well.

Our generation of children is not the church of tomorrow; they are the church of today. In the same way, our older generations are not the church of yesterday; they are the church of today too. Right from our infants to our elderly, and everyone in between, we are all the church of today. The church is the family of God, and we are all children of God – nothing changes that; not age, not ability, not anything.

So, unlike Peter Pan, let us be boys and girls who do grow up, but just like children, let us all enjoy and delight in life. This is the life God has shared with us through his Son by the Spirit. This is the life that grows in us as we grow in Christ. This is the life.

We were all children once. We still are.

Enjoy.

Cate Burton
A child of God

Digging by Silvia Purdie

            

The small spade slices through the sand
The small boy intent with effort
body straining
shoveling the sand out
and carefully dumping it on the growing pile.
The hole gets so big he almost falls in
toes gripping the edge to balance
heels lifting.
“Wuw” he congratulates himself
breathing hard
muttering under his breath.
“My hole is big!” he declares,
“I’m making a sandcastle.
A really big one.”
patting it down
scooping more.
Hole and pile,
work and pleasure
inseparable.

This summer our family was blessed to have a week camping in the sun on 90 Mile Beach. It was an astonishing experience, utterly different from normal life, up there where the oceans meet and tide and fish and heat and light become the rhythms of living.

We are home now, embarking on 2013, looking forward to all that a new year brings. My work is in parish ministry. Milson Combined Church is a smallish suburban church in Palmerston North, with a real heart for children and families. I also do what I can to support and promote Kids Friendly and youth ministry around the district. My husband is an Army Chaplain and we have 3 boys.

There’s always plenty to do. If we have the energy. And that’s a big part of what the Kids Friendly team does here in the Manawatu and all over, encouraging people to sustain their passion and commitment to children and families ministry. And a big part of that is keeping the work and pleasure inseparable.

As I watched little Arli digging on the beach, I loved the boundless energy as he worked. I reflected on how it’s like that with us and our ministries. We can work and work when we feel safe, when there’s other people cheering us on, when we’ve had a drink and a biccie, when we have the right tools and we can see that we’re getting somewhere!

I wonder which of those is missing for you as you begin all over again, another year of children’s ministry.

I wonder what your heart would say if you stopped to listen, what you need for yourself to sustain you this year.

Duty isn’t enough. Ideas aren’t enough.

I’m someone who’s full of ideas. I can always see the “Wouldn’t it be great if …!”

For us in Milson, it would be great if we had a relationship with our local school. It would be great if our preschool music families came to church. It would be great to get to know our neighbours. And we made good progress on these goals last year, and I have big hopes for this year. But each of these is way easier said than done, despite our best efforts. The knock-backs and rejections you get when you try to reach out and invite in, can be hard on the soul, draining on the energy.

In our own strength we really wouldn’t bother at all.

But it’s not just us, is it? It’s the Spirit of Jesus at work within us, that’s what works! And Jesus is like little Arli, digging away, never running out of sand, digging deep, building up, patting down, pouring out blessings inexhaustibly, inviting us again and again into his cycle of generosity. “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap.” (Luke 6:38)

May the Spirit of Jesus Christ be real to you again in this moment, and through the many moments this year, as you plan, as you prepare, as you work, when energy comes easy and when you are tired, as you meet with children and adults, as you leap and dance or sit and listen, as you tidy up afterwards, as you rest. God bless you with pleasure in your calling. Amen.

This blog was written by Rev Silvia Purdie, minister of Milsom Combined Church in the Wanganui Manawatu Presbytery.  Silvia is an avid Kids Friendly supporter, encourager and practitioner.